Change in Speech: Don't Judge a Dumb Kid by His Stutter

I've been reflecting on this year and the past as I approach 2011.  It's been a great year!  Although lately it's been a bit of a bummer...  I feel a bit stuck in my present situation: Temporarily broke and not totally sure which direction I'm going.  It also doesn't help when you have a college degree and get turned down for a job as a stock person- a job that I did when I was 15.  Although I guess when I did have that job at 15, I stopped going because I hated it.  So it goes.

I'm still attempting to make a living at doing what I love: Work related to film, photography, art, education, or travel.  But that still encompasses SEVERAL life paths... So I'm exploring what exactly I like doing without investing myself in a career that I don't like doing.  

While at my Grandma's for Christmas, I found her old VHS camcorder, with which she still shoots home videos. It's one of the huge cameras that feels like you're holding a rocket launcher as you shoot your 3 year old kid- man has technology CHANGED! It's equally impressive to see a lady in her 70s saddle that bad camera on her shoulder. Good work grandma! 

My state of the bummers was recently enlightened by the above home video I dug up: A document of me as a dumb 3 year old with a speech impediment. For a minute, I totally forgot I use to stutter. My mom sent me to speech school when I was 4 years old. I remember I couldn't say words like "think" because I couldn't make the "th" sound. If someone asked me their opinion, I would say, "I sink that..." or "I sink so..." Man was it difficult to express myself when my thoughts were drowning in the challenges of speech.

You can also see that I had difficulty grasping simple life questions like:

Grandma's Question: What's the name of [your guinea pig]?

My Answer: Me don't have rabbit... eh, ma, ma, my rabbit died...

Looking back at this video I realize I've come a long way! I've overcome the loss of a dear pet rabbit, 2 actually (Kelly and I bought a pet rabbit last year and it died), and I can now say what I'm thinking while answering relatively simple questions. That progress is encouraging when I now have to grapple with those big questions like, "What do I do with my life?"

Now I certainly cannot answer that yet... But hopefully I just need time and patience. And when I figure it out, I'll boast with the energy of a stuttering 3 year old and yell:

"Kia! Ha!"